Career Cube Blog

What your body language says is often more important than what you say verbally, especially when the two conflict. When they’re in sync, your movements are a reflection of what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling: your conscious and your unconscious. But when they aren’t, the unconscious prevails.

Why? Because while people will make themselves conscious of their words, few are conscious of their feelings and how that translates into body language, much less what that body language is saying. And in an interview, that can result in sending a message opposite what you intend.

A person who was recently fired or laid off is a good example of this dichotomy, especially when the termination takes place for reasons that have little to do with any situation the individual instigated. You did nothing to cause the severance, but you feel responsible anyway.

Since few job seekers know how to put a termination in perspective and handle it appropriately, it comes out how they move and how they conduct themselves. Almost every action is an apology. You knock gently on the door when the administrative assistant says, “Mr. Jackson can see you now.” You not only ask permission to sit, but you ask which chair. You either over explain or under answer.

Instead of speaking smoothly in a relaxed manner, your voice is too loud or can’t be heard. You say “um” or “ah” at the beginning and in the middle of your sentences. Everything about you screams insecure, even though you’re managing to articulate your accomplishments.

The result is that the hiring authority is puzzled as to how you managed to achieve so much, when your manner isn’t conducive to making things happen. It leaves him with a question about you. Hiring authorities don’t like to be left with questions; they want to be 100% confident of who they hire. So you’re out of the picture. Read more

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People form impressions of others based on the smallest details. Perhaps when you read this message line you laughed at how improbable it would be to NOT get a job offer because your handshake was too strong or too weak.

Well, you’re right, it doesn’t work that way. However, it IS one of the details that people use to form an impression of you.

We’ve all been the recipient of those bone-crushing, gee-I’d-like-to-USE-that-hand-in-the-future handshakes. Think about the impression you form of the person who just delivered that blow. Do you consider them too aggressive? Inconsiderate? Powerful? Overcompensating? Overbearing? Are you likely to want to shake hands with them again? They could have a great personality and be a nice person, but nevertheless you form an impression of them from the handshake. That seemingly minor detail you then compile into your mental database to help you make an overall impression of that person.
What about those handshakes that are the typical limp fish? Or, those kind of “fingers-only” handshakes? They leave me with the impression that this person doesn’’t want to get too close to me because I’m somehow contaminated. I never get a warm, friendly, approachable impression of those types of people. I am personally more influenced by the weak vs. the ultra-strong handshake to the point where if I was interviewing them for a customer service position, I would scrutinize their work experiences and resume a little harder to assure myself I was hiring the correct person. All because of a handshake.

It is hard to describe a “perfect handshake”, but I strongly recommend that you practice with a partner who will give you honest and direct feedback about what you are doing wrong. It might seem like a very minor detail, but when you’re interviewing for the perfect position you don’t want to take any chances.

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Yes siree, you did read that right. You, as the candidate, have the right to walk out of a job interview.

Oh my gosh, (Some of you are thinking) that seems so RUDE, so WRONG!

I’m not saying that you abruptly stand up and walk out of the interviewer’s office without any explanation. What I am saying is that if the position doesn’t meet what you’re looking for, and you know-beyond a shadow of a doubt-that you wouldn’t take the job even IF it was offered to you, then you can politely tell the interviewer this: “It doesn’t sound like I would be a good fit for what you’re looking for in this position. I’m sure that you have other work that you’d like to get back to, so I’d be fine ending the interview now. I really appreciate your time and the opportunity to meet with you and the team.”

They will be stunned because a very, very small percentage of people do this. They may even try to convince you that you would be the right person (because you always want what you can’t have). In their eyes you will look like a confident, polished professional, and everyone wants one of those working for them. However, you should stick to your guns and let them escort you to the door. Here’s a few questions I know are running through your mind:

Why can’t I use this tactic on jobs that I really want as a negotiation tactic?

Because it sets up a weird dynamic between you and the hiring manager. Let’s lay it out: They got your resume and thought you’d be a fit, then did a phone screen and you passed that criteria. When you come in for an in-person interview and they describe the position to you and you meet a few of the people, you announce to them that you don’t think you’d be a good fit for the job (but you really think you are). They are impressed by this tactic and their reflex action is to immediately go into selling you on the position. You reluctantly acquiesce and agree to continue the interview process. They decide to make you an offer, and you accept. The problem is that at some point the concept of buyer’s remorse is going to come into play. Buyer’s remorse is what you get after you make a purchase (typically of a high-ticket or impulse item, but it can happen on well-researched average purchases too). After they make you the offer, they’ll think back to your reluctance to even continue the job interview. It was such an odd move that it will definitely stick out in their mind. When you start, they’ll wonder what you know about your abilities that doesn’t make you a fit, and why they didn’t pick up on it. It stands a strong chance of putting you under more pressure to succeed than you normally would be if you didn’t mock-walk out. I’m not saying that it’s guaranteed to fail, but that it would be an incredibly risky move.

Why shouldn’t I just stick it out?

You can, and hope that it will get better or that there is another open position at the company. There’s nothing wrong with that. But if you ever find yourself in a completely dead-end interview-because you’re not qualified for or interested in the job, or if your new boss is definitely someone you wouldn’t be able to work for, why waste your time and theirs? As long as you are polite, you can take control of the situation and leave.

Why don’t they just tell me to leave?

Because companies aren’t used to doing that either. They are hoping that there’s something in your background that will still make you viable-you hold all the secrets to your experiences. They don’t know that you are definitely not qualified-only YOU know that. When I was a hiring manager I spent more time with some candidates than others. If I didn’t think they’d be a good fit with me, either personally or experience-wise, I’d only talk to them for about ½ hour, and not introduce them to my boss or colleagues. I would try to dig as deeply as I could into who they are and what they had done, but if I didn’t hear what I was looking for, then I politely walked them out. If they asked, I would have told them that I had some concerns about this not being a good fit for them-and then stress the fact that as much as I’m sure they’d like a new job, if it’s a bad fit it’ll end up being a nightmare for everyone in a few months.

So keep this in mind the next time you interview. You have power, you have control. You’re not at the mercy of the hiring manager to find a reason why you’re a good candidate for their job. If it won’t work, and you know it won’t work, then follow the script above and move onto the next opportunity.

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